Catch Your Attention
- Breanna Chavez
- Jul 13
- 7 min read
Inspired by Tate McRae's song, Purple Lace Bra
Fourth of July weekend was filled with many tragedies in Texas. After receiving more bad news Sunday afternoon, I drove home with tears streaming down my face. To be transparent, I spent the rest of the evening in a really bad mood- angry, confused, and upset with God for taking innocent lives. I woke up the next morning feeling equally as awful, but tried to pull it together in time for work. I managed to get dressed and drive halfway to work before I finally decided to call in sick. Although I wasn’t physically sick, I was spiritually.
In an attempt to lift my spirits, I decided to utilize a free trial at a gym I had been wanting to go to. If you’re a lover girl like me, you’ll probably relate to this, but it’s always been a dream of mine to meet a cute boy at the gym. I’ll be honest, that was part of my motivation for going, although I doubted it would happen, especially since I was not looking my best by any means. Nevertheless, I decided to push past my gym anxiety and walked into the gym with the mindset of “fake it till you make it.”
I went to the front desk and told the guy at the front that I was there to utilize my free trial. I immediately noticed he was cute and felt myself begin to automatically think, “He’d never be interested in me.” Perhaps my brain is programmed to think this as a result of never truly being pursued by a guy. I decided to ignore the voice of negativity in my head and instead revisited my “fake it till you make it” mantra. I pretended to be confident as I filled out the required forms and even noticed the guy acting a little bit awkward, which made me feel like I wasn’t alone. To my dismay, he ended up having to take my photo. Maybe he could sense my discomfort because he snapped the picture and said smoothly, “You have a pretty smile.” I was not expecting him to say that, so I laughed it off and went on my way. Again came the doubts. “He probably says that to everyone,” I thought.
Fast forward to the end of the day. I, of course, told my mom and sister about this interaction because it really did make my day. Naturally, they asked what he looked like, and I realized that I had yet to search him on social media. One quick Google search later, and I had found him. Without thinking too much about it, I followed him, but felt the Holy Spirit tell me not to message him. I’ll be honest, after doing some social media stalking, I wasn’t sure we had the same vibe (IYKYK). Plus, I knew I would never live it down if my friends found out I had been the one to message yet another guy first. (I may or may not have a history of doing this LOL).
The next day rolled around, and lo and behold, I got a message from gym boy. I’ll be honest, the rizz he had in real life seemed to have disappeared, but he was ultimately really nice and invited me to work out with him + attend a church event that is very similar to the ones held in College Station.
Though things didn’t progress with this guy, I believe the Lord used this situation to remind me of multiple things:
For one, it showed me that even when I’m at my “worst”, I am still valuable. I’ve definitely bought into the lie that in order to get male attention, I have to dress a certain way, but this interaction showed me that nothing is more beautiful than a gentle and quiet spirit, and the right guy will see that. Yes, I was wearing a crop top and some V-leggings, but this was covered up by my work t-shirt when I talked to gym boy. He saw my puffy eyes, arguably dorky glasses, and depressed demeanor, yet he still chose to compliment my smile, which led to a connection that reminded me that Christ cares for me.
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4
The wrong guys, however, will “only listen when [you’re] undressed,” as Tate McRae says in her song Purple Lace Bra. In the song, she describes the challenge of growing up in the spotlight and only feeling like people pay attention when she’s acting or dressing in a certain way.
I been singin', I been screamin' I been goin' all night 'til my throat's bleedin' I been cryin', I been dreamin' Yeah, I know that you look, but you don't see it Did my purple lace bra catch your attention?
I think every young girl has experienced the crisis of navigating confidence and catching the wrong kind of attention. I listened to a podcast called “Becoming Something” that had a few things to say about this. I’ll share some quotes from the episode here:
“Girls say, ‘Yeah, but guys are attracted to physical, and if I don’t dress that way, a guy’s not going to ask me out, and I’m not going to get married. . .’ On the one hand, I want to tell you, ‘The enemy is lying to you. Calm down. You’re going to be fine.’ But I think what I’ll tell you instead is, ‘So what? Then you get to stand before God, and he’ll say, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant.’ The one conversation you’re not going to have with him in that moment is, ‘Why did you force me to dress this way?’ and ‘Why did I never get married?’ That’s not going to happen. You’re going to look forward to being with God forever in paradise.”
“Let’s say we have a formal at my sorority, and we show up at the dance, and this one girl is wearing something that’s not very modest. I’m trying to be modest, and she’s getting all the attention. That is so hard. What I tell my girls as a father of two daughters is to slow down. Take note of all the attention she’s getting. Candidly, if you’re honest, you’d say she’s getting the attention that you want. Let’s just watch and see who she marries. How does that work out? Where does her life go? There are blessings that come from following God, and sometimes those blessings are singleness. Sometimes those blessings come in ways that you wouldn’t ever think or ever ask for, but I’m telling you, singleness is better than two divorces. Singleness is better than heartbreak.”
“Yes, if you dress modestly, you might be called to singleness. You might not get attention. But you might attract a man of God who is pursuing God and wants a wife who is going to live modestly and reflect Jesus in how she dresses, and be thoughtful in that way. That’s my story.”
“Let’s be honest. I think there are people listening who, in their heart they would say, ‘I would rather break God’s law and get attention from guys than be obedient.’ You just need to say that out loud. You need to say that in your prayers. Just say, ‘God, you know what, I believe this is what you want from me, and I’m not going to do that because I want to handle things on my own. I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it, and I’m going to take a shortcut.’ Every time someone takes a shortcut in Scripture, it costs them. Think of Abraham, who slept with his maidservant. Jacob, who didn’t wait on God. As you move through the scriptures, you get to Ananias and Sapphira, who took things into their own hands, and they died right there. Every time someone doesn’t wait on the Lord, it costs them. It’s a game of patience. It’s a game of ‘I’m going to walk in obedience, and I’m going to be patient.’ And you might feel left out, but be careful that your heart doesn’t grow hard towards the Lord. He’s not asking you for anything that’s not best for you. He’s a good God. And what he asks is best for you.”
Bottom line: When it comes to modesty, motive matters.
Gym boy turned out to be a Christian, which I don’t think is a coincidence. In fact, just the night before, my friend and I were joking about how I needed to find a nice Christian boy.
To make things even crazier, I had just reached out to a friend for prayer regarding my future husband. I hadn’t talked to the friend in a while, but for some reason, I felt called to reach out to her specifically. And guess what? Gym guy had the same name as the friend that I reached out to. No, this guy is not my future husband, but all of these “coincidences” showed me that God is hearing my prayers and is working in my love life.
I think making the first move is fun from time to time, but in this situation, I felt compelled not to do so. “You are worthy of being pursued,” I felt the Lord say to me. Because I chose to trust His voice, I got to see a tangible reminder of this truth before my very eyes.
This isn’t the first time a God has used a boy situation to teach me about Himself, and it won’t be the last. I am excited to continue the journey to meeting my future husband, and I know it’s going to be an epic God-story. However, I am grateful for my singleness and the extra time I currently have to write blogs like this.
Thanks for reading! Send any single Christian cuties my way <3
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