Blessed are the Depressed

Hey guys!

As I'm writing this, my parents will be boarding a plane to come home from Las Vegas. They went for my dad's work. They have done this one other time, but Bailee and I were in college. Read my blog about that here. This time was different in the sense that Bailee and I were left alone at our house for the first time overnight. I can't lie, I was excited to have some alone time and not have to wonder who my parents would invite over, but at the same time, I was nervous and worried about my mom. She hates planes, and she also hates being away from us. Anyways, the week leading up to this weekend was pretty rough. "What is going on?" I found myself thinking. Somewhere along the way, the Lord reminded me that we don't fight a battle against flesh and blood. The battle isn't the pending plane ride, travel anxiety, or the growing pains that come from doing something you've never done before. Sure, these things are not easy, but the real issue is much deeper- it's spiritual.

Let me give you an example. I won't lie, there have been times in the past when I've thought to myself, "Everything would be better if I had my own space." I thought this in the dorms in college when I had to share a room with my sister. I've also thought this at home when there's tension that I'd rather not face. Well, this past weekend, I finally got to see if my own space was the answer to all my issues. Although it was a nice change of pace, it still wasn't perfect. It was quiet, but maybe a little too quiet. I got to rest, but I did find myself a little bored. I had time to clean, but I felt the nagging sense of depression keeping me from wanting to do it. Yet another thing I can cross off my list of things I thought would finally satisfy me. So far, I've been able to cross off being Valedictorian, a Terry Scholar, head cheerleader, state champion, national champion, having the "perfect body", graduating from college, getting my dream job, getting into graduate school, and getting male validation. I fear (and hope) that the next things to cross off the list are marriage and children. However, now that I know that these gifts from God will be tarnisted by sin, I don't have to place pressure on them to be perfect. Instead, I can enjoy them for what they are and steward these sacred relationships and roles that I pray the Lord blesses me with in His timing.

If you haven't figured it out yet, everything on this side of heaven is broken. Everything has a cost. Healthy relationships come at the cost of selfishness. School comes at the cost of sacrifice. Following Christ comes at the cost of comfort.

There is good news, though. God knew it would be this way and provided a way for us to have hope.

Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose."

James 1:12 says, “Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him. This crown is for those believers who endure the face of difficult situations."

1 Corinthians 9: 24-25 says, "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever."

2 Timothy 2:7-8 says, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing."

And last but not least, Matthew 5:3-11:

The Beatitudes

He said:

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

If you're like me and you skipped over the scriptures listed above, I encourage you to go back and actually read them. When you do, you'll realize that everything you've been taught about life is wrong. More isn't better, unless it's more of Jesus. And how do we get more of Jesus? By going through the valleys. Don't get me wrong, you can totally experience God on the moutaintops, but you are more appreciative and in awe of the Lord if the journey to get there was an uphill battle. Think about how thankful moms struggling with infertility are when they finally get that positive pregnancy test. Think about the joy you will feel when you finally meet the man God has for you after several years of singleness. Think about how good it must feel to ring the bell and declare yourself cancer-free after a long battle of chemo and treatment.

While meditating on this truth that the Lord put on my heart, I rememberd something I heard counselor Freddie Amos say on Sadie Robertson's Live Original podcast one time. While telling a story about confiding in a mentor on a mission trip about her depression, she said this:

"She looked at me and she was like, 'Would you ever view your depression as a good thing? I was kind of taken aback. I was like why would that ever be a good thing? Like it's so bad. But I kind of sat on that and basically my whole trip to China just kind of dug through what that meant for me, like why it would be a good thing because she didn't elaborate. She just kind of like laid this question out in front of me to figure out my personal opinion on it and what I came to find out in China is the way God has used my depression has allowed me to have a need for him that people who don't have depression don't have. It kind of made me re-look at my depression. Instead of saying it's hindering me to say it's helping me because I can't go through my day-to-day and have joy like everyone else. I really need Jesus to have joy. So it's actually grown my relationship with God. I think it's that mindset change- the shift to say it's actually not bad. It can be used for good. That's a common theme we see in scripture right. Like anything can be used for good, but I think with depression specifically like it puts you in such a dark place that it's hard to see why it would be good. The analogy I think about all the time is like I felt like I was brought to my knees all the time every single day trying to pick myself up, and I couldn't. But when you think about being on your knees, like that's the perfect position of surrender. It's like I needed to be at a low point. I needed to be at surrender for God to hold me by my hand and pick me back up."

Link to podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR4HwxwAz58

I think these words pretty much speak for themselves, and they heavily connect to a sermon I listened to this morning titled Blessed are the Spiraling. If that's the case, then I am VERY blessed. At the end of the sermon, the preacher gave some practical tips for overcoming a spiral. His last tip was to look for beauty, He said that we were created for the garden of Eden, so we should continue looking for hints of that perfect place in the midst of the world's brokenness. I love this concept, and if it weren't for my depression, I wouldn't be as motivated to seek out beauty in my everyday life.

Link to Blessed are the Spiraling sermon: https://youtu.be/ygMaV6JwY3A?si=aBsM2ULGyS19X38I

I know depression REALLY doesn't feel good in the moment, but I hope this blog encouraged you in some way. There is power in words, wise counsel, working out, and worship, but there's also power in Wellbutrin (an antidepressant- there are others of course, but I'm proud of this alliteration). Just imagine every day you get through faithfully, another jewel is added to your crown and another plate of gold is added to your mansion in Heaven. God loves you friend, and I'm so sorry you're hurting. In the meantime, I hope this blog can be a source of comfort for you.

Love, Breanna Chavez